Out of My Mind
by Dr4gonIc3F34th3r
Summary: The random collection of unfinished stories, one shots, prompts, headcanons that are sorta turned into stories. Literally anything I come up with. Accepting suggestions. Chapter 4- Nalu fluff, because I feel bad about not updating for a while!
1. Dating Sites

**Im sitting in class "working". Well. My Doc Manager gave up on deleting files, so this is number 20 in the Manager. Gosh, I need new computer...**

 **I have no idea how dating sites work. If anyone does, they can correct what they would like.**

 **Oh, implied things in here. Rated T for a reason.**

* * *

Lucy was on several very strange dating sites, and still waiting to be accepted to some.

No, she was not a whore, (hadn't even had sex with any of them!) she just REALLY needed to find the perfect man before her father decided to marry her off because her father was just that kinda guy.

All the assholes in town simply wanted her for her body(especially Loke and that guy had a girlfriend!), so she had to meet people some way...

One of the sites she was still waiting to be accepted in was called Fairy Dating, and not only was it a dating site, it also had a group chat for boys and girls, and separate girls chat and separate boys chat so that you could make new friends. The only reason she knew this stuff was because of a few helpful online friends who had an account on there despite the fact that they were dating.

The girl checked her email again, looking for friend requests from any other site she was on. Nope- only those really creepy people from the Blue Pegasus dating site that kept sending her really weird messages. She could tell why they were there... (and one of them looked like and old man!)

But, below the spam of weird messages,(she would need to end her membership to that site soon) was a message from the Fairy Dating site- was it accepted? When was it sent? Did I miss the sign-in time?(1)

YES- HECK YES- SHE WAS ACCEPTED! Lucy quickly clicked on the link, and the sign-in box appeared, along with a message saying, You have confirmed your email. Welcome to Fairy Dating! Please log in and add your credit information to start your membership.

She followed the instructions, then moved onto her profile.

 _Real name-_ Lucy Ashley. This was the name that Lucy always used for online sites, whether they needed a username or an actual name.

 _Age-_ This she left blank. If it required an age, then she could just lie- there was no way she was putting down 18 like last time because then men hit on her left and right.

 _Zip code-_ She had location services on. They already knew her location and simply wanted her to confirm it. Lucy had always been scared of putting down her zip code because she thought people would be able to know where she lived, but she now know that it was so the site could find people close to her.

 _Self Description-_ Cheerful, athletic blonde that enjoys reading! I am also writing a novel and would like someone to beta it, anyone can volunteer. I also love puppies and have a dog named Plue.

 _What you want in you partner-_ A kind young bookworm(preferably not over 30). They have to be able to sit around and not bother me as I read, eat what I cook them, cleanup after themselves, and be willing to wait a few years(or travel) to meet me.

She hit the _Save and complete_ at the bottom of the page and waited for it to load. When it did, the page was split in half- one half with pictures of her possible matches, and the other with a list of people she could become friends with.

Lucy quickly went over and clicked on profile icon (on the friends side) that she recognized- Levy M., Or, as her username said, WritingBlue. (Levy was a strange girl, but a good friend for the most part. Until it came to choosing a boyfriend. The short quiet girl had a surprisingly weird taste in boys.) After hitting the Friend Request button, she scrolled through the girls profile.

 _Real name-_ Levy M.

 _Age-_ 19\. (It was amazing that the girl was older than her and still shorter.)

 _Zip code-_ Hidden.

 _Self Description-_ Im a shy, cheerful, short girl with blue hair! That's why I'm special, it was some kind of birth defect, like how albinos are very pale, I have blue hair. To make it fit(for the most part) I mostly wear blue sundresses. I love to read but am horrid at writing. And cooking. I started out on here from the friends(because Im shy and college isnt a good place for a shy person) but somehow ended up dating Gajeel, his screen name is BlackIronKitty. I would suggest you go yell at him because he has full control over whether or not I add someone as a friend, the overprotective bastard...

Lucy frowned at this last part- When did Levy start dating?! And giving out her password?! She was more strict on internet safety then Lucy's father, and that's saying something!After exploring others profiles(mostly girls, she wasn't good at making friends with boys), the girl noticed that the alert thingy in the top righthand corner of her screen was read and had a 2 next to it- Wow, two alerts already! I hope it's some hot boys!

The first alert disappointed her, it was only a friend request from Erza S., who held the screen name of WomenWithSwords. After skimming through her profile, (A full death threats to some other user named Gray and with the screen name of IceBaby, saying something about him not spamming the group chat and to hurry up and come over tonight so they can finish homework. Wow, split personality much?) she accepted the friend request, and moved onto the other alert, a message from a boy name Natsu D., with the screen name of DragonRoar.

The message read, _Hey Luigi.. Luigi... LUIGI! STUPID AUTO CORRECT. WELL. DEAL WITH LUIGI FOR NOW. Im Natsu, and I noticed that you are new! Anyway, if you need any sex... wait what. AUTOCORRECT HOW DO I TURN YOU OFF. JUZZ. WAIT WHAT. I GIVE UP. WELL LUIGI JUST IF YOU NEED HELP THEN JUST ASK. OH. AND IF YOU REPLY I WILL SEND A FRIEND REQUEST._

She smiled. Nice person, maybe, but what was this guy's reputation?

Lucy clicked on his profile, and was directed to the boy's page.

 _Real Name-_ Natsu Dragneel (hm, lucy thought, someones brave... He put his full name...)

 _Age-_ 18

 _Zip code-_ Hidden

 _Self Description-_ Im a fire dragon slayer that goes by the name Natsu! If your screen suddenly catches on fire while looking at this, its because im hot. GRAY FULLBUSTER OR ICEBABY IS A ICE PRINCESS AND A STRIPPER DO NOT TALK TO HIM.(Lucy giggled at this part, she hoped he realized this was a dating site and that comment would make other girls want to check out this so-called "Stripper") HES ALSO DATING SOMEONE SO YEAH DON'T GET HIS GIRLFRIEND MAD.(2) (Oh, that explained why he wasn't worried about putting up all this stuff about his friend stripping!)

Lucy smiled and went back to the message that this interesting boy had sent her.

 _Hello! Thank you for offering help. I will remember to ask if I need any. Now, about that autocorrect..._

(she also bookmarked his profile, not that she would need it. This places was definitely memorable)

* * *

 **(1)- On a few sites I have joined, you have to confirm your email within a certain time or you are not allowed on the site. Just a fact that I decided to put here.**

 **(2)- He is not dating Juvia, I REPEAT. HE IS NOT DATING JUVIA.**


	2. Drinking

**uh... i guess this is a oneshot collection here now... do im putting this here...**

 **idek...**

* * *

Juvia banged her head on the bar, still upset over the rejection from her precious Gray-sama. Which was the only reason she was IN a bar in the first place. Other wise she would have been going out on a date and then making babies with her precious Gray-Sama after he had accepted her confession-

BUT NO. HE JUST HAD TO SAY NO TO HER ASKING HIM TO GO OUT ON A DATE.

...Resulting in Cana deciding that the bluenette needed to cool down and taking her out to get a drink.

And here she was, half drunk((well, alot less drunk then Cana for that matter)) and still sitting here.

"Mmm, that parfume!"

Juvia's head shot up, and she turned around slowly as an ugly, short man stared her in the eyes, his unusually large nostrils widening as he _smelled_ her.

"Ah, you, my lady, have a wonderful parfume! I would like to place a name with the scent?"

"J-juvias name? Well, Juvias n-name is Juvia o-of course..." She replied.

The ugly man smiled a REALLY creepy smile and held out his hand, bowing his head. *Sniff* "Well, I am Ichiya, the most handsome man in this room!" ((Juvia tried her best to keep from frowning at this, but couldnt help but let a small frown creep onto her face.))

"Why, my beautiful lady, what is wrong with you?" Ichiya asked. *Sniff sniff*

"W-w-well... Uh..."

A hand suddenly wrapped around her shoulders, and a familiar voice reached her ears.

"Hey, creepy dude! Shes my girlfriend, not yours!"

The man looked at the completely drunk brunette as Cana wrapped herself around Juvia and cuddled her head against her shoulder. "Uh... You have to take her you? Your giving her a ride? Ah, what a wonderful parfume that you have, as well!" *Sniff sniff*

Cana gave him a weird look. "No, I mean shes mine not yours and im gonna go home and kiss her," The girl said firmly. She then grabbed Juvias hand and pulled her away, not looking back.

"That dude was creepy, but if you want him, then you can go back, not me!" Cana exclaimed.

Juvia just gave Cana a strange look.

"Well, Juvia thanks Cana for saving Juvia back there!"

* * *

 **((I SHIP JUVANA. DEAL.))**


	3. Butterfly

_**DAY 1**_

Yesterday had been hatchday for you, and now you lay on your back on a branch, facing up at the sky and letting your wings dry out…

While your mother's dead body lay next to you.

Well, that was kinda creepy when you think about it, but it really didn't seem like a big deal to you, having a beautiful, blood-red butterfly laying next to you. Dead.

You didn't even know how you knew half the things, they just popped into your mind and stayed there!

Your tiny hands reaches up to touch one of the delicate, slightly wet wings attached to your back. Hm, they only needed to dry a bit more. _I'm going to go introduce myself to.. That golden butterfly with the blonde hair! Yeah, she's pretty!_

Fluffing out your short scarlet hair((you wanted it to be long like your mother hair, but you figured that would take time)), your slowly walked inward on the tree branch towards the trunk of the tree.

"Hello!" You call. Your voice comes out deeper and louder than you thought, but it has a nice ring to it. Unfortunately, your voice scares the golden butterfly.

She turns around quickly, squinting her beautiful brown eyes slightly, as if she wants to attack you.

Of course, you know that she won't attack you, her wings are drooping behind her back, very limp and very wet. In fact, you can see a small tear in the top corner of her right wing.

"I would suggest laying down on this branch, it will help so your wings don't rip!" You offer, pointing at the top right corner of her right wing.

She frowns at you, then sits with her back to the branch.

"Look at who's talking- the one who has a beautiful mother that DOESN'T look like a rotting corpse!" She burst.

It took a second for you to process this, you brain taking in the new words and telling you what they are. That's just how your brain works, you guess…

 _Wow, someone's angry!_ You think.

"Where's your mother?" You ask.

"She's busy looking like a rotting corpse for everyone that likes that kinda stuff," Golden Butterfly answers.

You sit there for a minute, not really sure how to respond. Again.

A random question pops into your head, and you decide it would be a better topic to talk about then Golden Butterflies apparently… Rotting… Mother…

"Hey, do you know if we have name?" You suddenly say. The random question sparks some kind of kinder side of Golden Butterfly, and her face softens as she thinks.

"Well, I don't know. I think that we should make up names!"

Her random mood change surprises you, but a smile grows on your face and you nod your head.

"We should! What do you think my name should be?"

She observes you, looking up and down your body. You're suddenly feeling very exposed, being naked because… Well… You were just born yesterday. And no one is ever born wearing anything. But no one else seemed bothered by it.

As Golden Butterfly thinks, you look around to see what others are doing. One male is grabbing a leaf and hiding his lower part with it. Liking this idea, you grab two large leaves and some twigs.

Looking up at Golden Butterfly again, you say one word- "Lucy."

She looks up, confused.

"Your name should be Lucy!" You say cheerfully. She looks happy at the name, but seems to have trouble coming up with yours.

"I feel like your name should have something to do with your beautiful hair…" She mutters, sitting next to you and wrapping the leaf around herself.

The longer part of the leaf wraps around her body, creating a short piece of what you guess will now be called "Clothing."

Being the helpful butterfly you are, you take the twig and poke holes in the part where the leaf meets at the back, then thread it through so that it stays on, held up only by the leaf.

Lucy does the same for you.

"I think your name should be Red, like your hair!" She suddenly says.

You shake your head.

"No, that doesn't sound right…"

"Blood?" She offers.

You laugh and shake your head again.

"Um…. Scarlet!"

You stop for a minute, liking the name offer, but it just doesn't sound right to you!"

"Hm.. Maybe nothing to do with your hair… ERZA!" She shouts, a bit too loudly. Lucy covers her mouth, embarrassed.

You laugh. "Erza- I like that name! Maybe Scarlet could be my second name?"

"Yeah!" Lucy shouts, suddenly excited. "I want a second name too, something to do with love…"

"Heartfilia!" You offer. She nods, liking the name.

"Maybe we should start over with introducing ourselves," she offers.

You hold out your hand.

"I am Erza Scarlet!"

"I am Lucy Heartfilia!"

None of the info in this is actually accurate end if there are any misspelled words please tell me I hate typing on mobile...


	4. Its a mistake!

**i felt bad for writing yoi but not fairy tail so i decided to be normal and write nalu instead of one of my creative crack pairings**

* * *

Lucy finished pulling on her clothing.

She had just gotten out of the shower, and was a little cold, but otherwise very relaxes. Besides that, there were no blue cats or pink haired boys bothering her!

"Luigi!"

Scratch that, there was an annoying pinkette that seemed to have just arrived.

She turned around to face her window, but found that it was closed and the bed was still made. This ment that they either hadnt come in through the window(oh mavis did they break down the wall?!) or had covered up their tracks.

Then, Lucy turned around and found Natsu sitting at her table, smiling.

"What do you think your doing there?" She shouted.

"Watching you!"

Lucy went quoet for a moment, thinking, then shouted at the boy,

"DID YOU WATCH ME CHANGE?!"

For a minute, you could have thought that LUCY was the dragon slayer instead of Natsu, she was literally bursting into flames! Either way, she moved to attack the pinkette, but he wrapped his arms around her instead, leaving her struggling.

"Woah there, Lucy! Whats got you so worked up today?"

"ALL. I. WANTED. WAS. TO. HAVE. A. PEACEFULL. DAY!" She shouted, banging her fists on his arms.

Natsu responded by tightening his grip on her torso, then moving one of his arms to lock her wildly swinging limbs into place.

"Common, Lucy, calm down!"

At that moment, a sliding sound* could be heard, and both the mages turned towards Lucy's window.

Happy stood there, wings spread wide, face a bit red.

"I'll.. Just, uh... Go.." He giggled a bit, but it was a nervous giggle. Like he ws trying to decide if he was afraid of what they possible could have been doing or if he wanted to go tell Mira and the rest of the guild about them.

"NO! HAPPY! COME BACK!"

* * *

 **Aaand off to bed I go! (if my cat stops purring in my ear and I stop watching anime hahaha. i also need to stop thinking about the 5 secret santas i have to do, and the comic i have to update... well, theres my life in a nutshell!)**


End file.
